What to do When STUCK in LIFE 2023

Are you stuck? Maybe your answer is I don’t know. I feel low, I feel like doing something else, I want to be somewhere else.
Being stuck is a strange feeling we don’t know what do we want and even we don’t know that are we stuck or are we just bored. This feeling of being bored and stagnation if has extended overall long period of time, then maybe you are stuck.

Being stuck in life is something we all have faced in some phase of life. And don’t be alarmed if you are facing this time and again. Lots and lots of people face this situation now and then, in fact this is a sign that you are ready for next growth in your personal or/and professional life. Being a life coach I can vouch that 90% of my clients were stuck and needed help. It is fair to seek help whenever needed. Here you will find points which you can use as self help guide.

So lets get started step by step in breaking this phase together.

All these steps have no particular serial order and one can be more effective for you than other. So be free to go for it as per your will and intuition, because your heart knows whats best for you.

1. It is NORMAL

The first and most important step is to understand that being stuck in life is a normal phase and everyone has or will face this situation in life. This is also one of the most difficult point to understand because we feel that we are the only one who are going through this kind of phase in life. is But honestly it is not the case. We are always taught to be strong and being stuck is regarded as a sign of weakness but trust me it is not. Take this it is just as another face of life and this will pass soon.

It is easier said and done but once you convince yourself that this is a normal phase you will get courage to phase the situation in a better manner.

2. Take Pause

Taking pause is very important. In this fast moving life everyone is running. If you think deeply then you will realise that every other person will say that time was moving very fast. Why?
The reason is that we are not taking pause. We are constantly chasing one or another thing. Either we are planning for a next party or a next trip or chasing our deadlines or preparing for exam . There is one thing or another which is constantly going in our life.

We are not taking pause to live in this moment.
We are running so fast that we don’t realise it is our body and mind who is asking for rest and maybe you are just stuck because you are mind and body needs just to take pause.

Stay at home. Take long showers, enjoy long walks, drink your favourite coffee, do the thing you love or just sit with yourself.

3. Spend time with Nature

Many of the problems in today’s world is because we are very much disconnected with nature. You are a part of universe, but with development we have parted ourselves so much with nature that now this modernisation is becoming a kind of problem problem for us. And this is just because we are more and more disconnected with nature.
Starting from our sleep cycle to our eating patterns and excessive exposure to blue light.
It is said Technology is a double aged sword. It’s upon us on how to find a balance in this modern life between Technology and Nature.
So when you find yourself stuck disconnect from the modern technological world and connect more with nature. You will find yourself aligned more to the universal forces and answers will come to you automatically.

Travelling to a place which connects to you is an ideal way for this.

A solo trip allows you to hear your inner voice clearly. You connect with nature and self at same time. At same time connect with new people and take a break from current situations. Helps you in relaxing fully and immersing in things you actually love.

4. Take break from Current situation

Taking Break on current situation is very important. When we are stuck in life most of the times we go round and round and the same circumstances.
There are various reasons for being stuck and some of it are few people who don’t want to change or are not compatible with us but we keep dragging the relationship . Being away from such people we will make us realise is that relation worthy or not. This applies not only to love reltions but extent to friends and office colleagues.
In same manner we might be indulging in wrong eating habits, wrong routine and when we take the break from present we may find out answers.
Maybe we are just two board of present and routine for sometime.
And in many cases it is the work that we actually don’t want to do but we are stuck doing you know various reasons. By taking break we can find out what exactly is the thing we miss and what exactly other things we are thankful that are absent currently.
As much as we can do we need to get rid of things that makes us feel thankful while being absent.

5. Connect with Past

We all are taught to progress and to be fair this is the only right thing in life, to move forward in life. But does that mean that we have to separate from our roots, from our past? Maybe no.
It is the fast pace of life that does not allow us to connect back to our roots and at some point of life we feel an emptiness. In this situation it will be great if we indulge back into the activities we loved, and connect with the people with whom we share bonds of love.
In India in earlier times families with strongly connected but now with the changing times we are mostly nuclear families. Most of us have move to difference cities. So taking a drink a break and connecting with old places, old friends and relatives helps you to find out what actually makes you happy.
Being connected to the roots is a fairway to being connected with in a self

6. Start Journaling

A problem well stated is a problem half-solved.

Charles Kettering

Journals are planning journals, gratitude journal and also periodic journals which you write in some phase like the one we are dicussing.

Most of the time our problem is that we don’t know what is your problem. Funny isn’t it? Yet if you think deeply over the sentence you will realise that when we are stuck we don’t get what is your problem.
Writing down our current situation, how we are feeling, what we like and what we don’t, will solve half of our problem. You can go deeply into the situation and find out what is actually wrong. Don’t be exclaimed if at the end of this exercise you will find your answer.

More than a problem solving mechanism I seed journaling as a way to see inside ourselves. It is highly recommended to do gratitude writing in a daily manner.
Planning for the next day making a to do list have immense benefit in our productivity and mental health.
And these are the activities that everyone must do, in fact we should encourage children also to excise gratitude writing, and affirmation writing .

What are the things you can write in a Gratitude journal?

The answer is literally, anything. 

Sometimes it’s okay even if the only good thing that happened or you did today was breathing.

Your gratitude journal or log is personal that must be unique to you and your life. No one can tell you what makes the cut for you and your particular circumstances. Read more about Gratitude Journaling

7. Engage in a Hobby

Hobby is not just an activity it is a way to express ourself. It is when we fail to express ourselves totally we get stuck in life.
Everyone wants to express themselves and there’s no better way than to practice what you love.
Activities like painting, singing, dancing, gardening to name a few ignites our creativity and expression. This no better way to experience life then through out art. It may also be a sport or cooking.

My favourite hobby is cooking. When I cook it ignites my sense of smelling, of taste, my creativity and my feelings. Strange a simple daily chore can do that much for mental health.

A hobby maybe something you love to do as a child or always had a Desire to learn but never got time. Take out time from your busy life in engage in a activity that will bring you closer to yourself.

Research shows that people with hobbies are less likely to suffer from stress, low mood, and depression. Activities that get you out and about can make you feel happier and more relaxed. 

8. Connect with New

As we discussed earlier that being connected to past is very important but more important is than that is to move forward and explore the new, explore the future. Connect to the new. Being stuck in life, it is a important sign that’s something new is waiting for us, we are ready for the change.
It may be connecting to a new person personally or professionally, learning a new activity. There might also be a chance that a whole new life is waiting ahead for you. New place, new people, new work, or maybe some of that.

It is very important for us to be ready to embrace the change. To welcome the change with open arms.

9. Self Love

The most common mistake and the worst mistake we all do when we are problem is we start blaming ourselves for this situation. Criticising self in any situation makes the situation even worse. Something which might have been changed with a proper action is dragged longer when we indulge in self critisism.

Self love is an effective way to boost our mental and physical health and works as a miracle in changing our life situation. Though it is very important to practice self care in regular life it becomes vital when we are going for rough phase of life. Stop blaming yourself. It is okay. This will pass soon.

The important thing to remember is that self-care and admiring yourself is not selfish, so relieve yourself of any guilt you have about taking the opportunity to devote yourself to destressing and developing yourself up. Even if you only have 10-15 minutes a day to dedicate to your wellbeing, it will make a big difference in helping you to rejuvenate the mind, body, soul connection.

Benefits of Self-care

• Self care improves mental health.
• In long term self care boosts productivity.
• Self-care improves clarity and creativity.
• It reduces stress level.
• You are fueled up and ready to give more love.
• Makes you more empathetic.

10. Meditate

Meditation is a simple way of freeing your mind, forgetting about daily anxieties and focusing on mental relaxation. Going into a meditative state involves learning to become a passive observer of one’s thoughts. It does not mean suppressing them or attempting to force them to disappear.

“Your mind is like this water, my friend. When it is agitated, it becomes difficult to see. But if you allow it to settle, the answer becomes clear.”

― Kung Fu Panda

Meditation clears the clutter of mind. It helps the ripples of thought to settle down and then we can see clearly what is the real problem.

Meditation for Beginners read this article in case you are new and want to begin.

What not to do when you feel stuck in life

To reduce any extra stress and worry that can arise when feeling stuck, keep these in mind: 

• Try not to over-identify with the situation. Say, “I’m feeling stuck,” rather than “I am stuck.” It’s subtle, but important because it allows you to remember that feelings pass. One moment you might feel stuck, but the next moment you might feel tired, or bored or elated, or any number of emotions. 
• Don’t beat yourself up. Most people like to have clarity and control over their lives, so the feeling of being stuck can be frustrating. Rather than beat yourself up over feeling stuck, treat yourself with kindness and self compassion.
• Don’t focus on the stuck area as the only thing in your life. Remember that each situation that makes you feel stuck is just one part of your life. For example, if you feel stuck at work, spend some time appreciating what is good about your health or relationships.
• Try not to blame others and instead remember how you can take responsibility for yourself. We don’t live in a vacuum, and others’ decisions and actions can impact our lives—but dwelling on that isn’t productive. Remember that you’re ultimately in charge of many aspects of your life and work. 
• Don’t doubt your ability to handle the outcomes of your decisions or choices. If you’re really stuck with a choice between two options, they may be equal—or one would be more obvious. When you consider the cost of staying in the limbo of indecision, you may find it’s better to commit to a decision and move forward with the self-belief that you can handle what comes next. Trust yourself. 

How to help someone that is stuck?

Everyone feels stuck in life now and then. Here’s how you can support others when they find themselves in this situation.

1. Listen. When someone is feeling stuck with a complex challenge, it is incredibly comforting to have someone who will listen without judgment.
2. Normalize it. Feeling stuck happens to us all, and can be a sign of growth and evolution. When people are stuck, they often can feel isolated and alone with the situation, so show them care and compassion.
3. Resist giving advice. It’s normal to want to offer ideas and advice, but it’s not as helpful as letting people come up with solutions for themselves. Your answer to the problem might not be the right one depending on their needs, values, or levels of risk tolerance.
4. Get permission to ask questions and lean into curiosity. You might begin by asking questions like, “What do you want?” and “What’s important about that?” Then help open up new insights by asking “What’s getting in the way?” and “What could you try?” When people feel genuinely heard in a non-judgemental way, they can often come to their own solutions and essentially shine their own light through the fog.

In case you are feeling stuck you can reach out to me. You can write an email to apurvalalranjan@gmail.com or DM me on Insta @travelntreat_

How can you CRAFT YOUR FUTURE